Saturday, October 30, 2010
Friday, October 29, 2010
This is what the summary on IMDB says about the movie:
"Set during World War II, a story seen through the innocent eyes of Bruno, the eight-year-old son of the commandant at a concentration camp, whose forbidden friendship with a Jewish boy on the other side of the camp fence has startling and unexpected consequences."
That summary does not do the movie justice. I had a flood of different emotions during the movie. I cried. A lot. I don't want to give too much away though so I'll just tell you what I thought it was about generally.
This movie shows the consequences that can follow pinpointing one group of people for being a specific way and torturing and terrorizing them. This movie shows the turmoil of living with somebody you thought you knew and then find out they have an entirely different side. This is a movie about what happens when you come to conclusions without hearing both sides. This is a movie about believing something and then having something rock your world to the point of clarity. This is a movie about what can happen when people wear blinders and believe their way is the best way and there can be no other way. This is a movie about a family who is ripped apart and punished in a way you'd never expect. This is a movie about the innocence of a child and shows us how we need to sometimes dig down and remember our own childhood innocence.
I do hope that you will rent it (or read it). Please let me know what you thought of the movie if you do watch it or have watched it.
(CAUTION: a little whining and complaining coming)Yesterday, I stayed at home with Teagan all day long. I loved on her and I took care of her like any mommy would. We basically didn't move from the couch except to feed her and change her diaper. I even set the alarm so I could get up every three hours to give her the meds through the night (end of whining). If she hadn't been feeling yucky it would have been a perfect day because I love when she cuddles up close to me, nuzzles in my neck and goes to sleep.
I sent Josh a text message that we needed baby Tylenol because they told me we could alternate between Tylenol and Motrin and since the recall we haven't had Tylenol in the house. When he got home he had gotten all he could find but it was the wrong thing. He lovingly went back out and got the right stuff. He fixed dinner and got me anything I needed so I could care for Teagan. My husband is an amazing daddy, what can I say?
Here comes the part where I eat that humble pie. This morning around 5:35 Teagan woke up and since it was still kind of early I brought her to bed. At least I tried to bring her to bed. She wasn't having it. She did not want to lay down. So she and I got back up. I took her into her bedroom and did everything I could think of doing. She continued to scream. I don't mean whine and yell. I mean SCREAM at the top of her lungs, arch her back like she was skydiving and cry real tears. I put her on her back and started bicycling her legs and massaging her tummy. She usually reacts like this when she gets gassy or constipated. I thought this might have happened because of all the meds so I gave her some gas drops and continued trying to bicycle her legs and massage her tummy. She continued to scream in what seemed like pain. Then I saw a shadow at the door. Superdad was in the doorway. He scooped Teagan up and instantly she stopped crying. I selfishly felt like she had just kicked me in my stomach. I had those "how dare he come in here and pick up HIS daughter and she instatnly be okay" feelings. I just sat there. Stunned. He asked what was wrong and I told him (shortly) that I was bicycling her legs because I thought she was constipated and that typically helps. He asked if I wanted her back and I told him no, she was happier with him and then got up. She kind of put one hand out at me and then took it back and I told her I wasn't going to take her from Daddy. I was going back to bed. (Even typing this I'm shaking my head, really?) I went to bed and they came too, when he laid her in the bed she istantly reached out to me and of course I pulled her close and told her I was sorry and that it was okay. She cuddled into her usual place on me and we all fell back asleep for a little while.
I thought a lot about why Teagan stops crying when Josh picks her up. She feels his calm. She feels his protection. It's two things I feel when I'm upset and he wraps his arms around me. I am the nuturer, the cuddler and the soft mushy/emotional one. She feels that I am trying to fix whatever is wrong but sometimes I get a little flustered and she senses that. He is the strong tower of protection and love. He is the calm in the storm no matter how big the storm is. He loves Teagan in a different way then I do but his love is no less important or not as strong as mine. Words can't really express the gratitude I have for my husband in times like these....I just hope it doesn't take and entire humble pie next time to remember it. I love you My Love.
Thursday, October 28, 2010
This morning after nursing twice (3:30 when she woke up and then at 5:30...I figured she didn't feel well and hopefully nursing would help at least a little) she came to bed with Josh and I for another few hours. We finally got up a little after 8. Teagan decided she wanted bananacado for breakfast but the avacado had gone bad so I cooked her some apples so she could have apple-banana for breakfast. She sweetly gummed on a frozen waffle while I made her breakfast and mine. After breakfast I checked her temp again and it was 99.7...much less scary to me then 101.7. So far this morning she has been acting okay. Right now she is takin a nap on my chest. I love that she still sleeps so well on my chest.
I had complained earlier in the week that I would have loved a day off...I didn't mean I wanted Teagan to be sick to get it. Luckily she's a sweet and not too grumpy sick.
I'd also like to thank the mommy's and ladies that work with kids that sent fever advice our way last night. It's so nice to know such helpful people!
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Well, we were lucky enough to have this experience on Sunday evening. We were leaving our community group meeting and as we were coming up on the exit to the development I thought I saw a cat in the middle of the road. As Josh slowed to a stop we saw it was not a cat but an owl. It was beautiful. It was eeriely still though. I sat there for a moment very still and then realized, I have to take a picture! I struggled to quickly get my "everyday" camera out of my pocketbook, zoomed in and took a picture. The picture turned out to be crap. Then somebody pulled up behind us and the owl looked at us one more time and then flew away. It was one of the most breathtaking things I have ever seen. I've seen birds take off before but the grace of this mysterious creature was nothing like I'd ever seen before. As Josh drove off he told me I should call Joe and Lauren and tell them Harry Potter was in their neighborhood (only some people will find that funny).
The picture didn't take very well because I got a little flustered when Josh told me there was a car behind us. I did find a picture on the internet that resembles our owl even though I haven't found a picture that actually does the beauty of this bird justice. I also found by researching that it was a "barred owl" or a "hoot owl". Teagan and I decided to call the owl "Owly" after her new favorite book from her baby pen pal Eva.
Friday, October 22, 2010
Not a lot of you know my story. To be truthful nobody knows all of it. Some know bits and pieces but my husband is the only one who comes close to knowing the entirety of it. I suffered with an eating disorder for 6 years. It went undetected or at least unconfronted for almost 5 1/2. I was nowhere near the scary skin and bones pictures that are on the billboards and discovery channel documentaries but I was sick. I was incredibly sick. My mind and my body were taken over by the disease. I use to draw the word "FAT" on myself with markers and stare at myself in the mirror for hours. I used to take freezing cold showers when I head eaten too much. I used pinch my "fat" to the point of bruising my skin. The eating disorder almost took my life. I will share that story some other time. With the eating disorder came severe clinical depression, insomnia and OCD tendencies. For a lot of sufferers these all go hand in hand so those things are not abnormal. There are still days, fewer and farther between, that I think "I just ate ____, I'm too full and I need to throw it up" or "I feel so full. I hate feeling full."
In all honesty, I was scared to get pregnant because I was worried about what the weight gain would do to my well being but pregnant actually changed my entire mindset and helped me get completely healthy. Having another human be completely dependent on you quickly changes your mindset. I think breast feeding Teagan has been extremely helpful in preventing a relapse because I know if I don't eat and get the nutrients I need then neither does she. I have imagined how easy it would be to slip back into that dark place to lose the baby weight but I refused to because Teagan's needs are greater then my want to be the skinny girl.
Thankfully, pregnancy has shown me that I am no longer a girl. I am a woman. I have curves. I have girl parts that have come in quite handy providing nutrition to my sweet girl for 9 months now. I will never be flat chested. I will never be able to shrink my hips. I'll admit there are days when I want to be flat chested and shaped like my husband (a stick) and then other days I like to figure out how to rock my curves in an appropriate manner.
When I saw the t-shirt in question my heart ached for Teagan. She already has a history of eating disorders and depression to fight. I ache at the thought she will have to go up against the same billboards, same messages, same pictures that her mom did. Possibly even worse. I vowed to get healthy not only for me but for her. I want her to grow up in a home where HEALTH is the focus. Not weight. Not inches. Not looks. I want her to be a kid. She will not be in makeup before she is in high school ( a little nail polish and playing dress up is fine). She will not wear shorts and skirts up to her rear end (no matter how long her Reid legs might be) with the excuse that everything is too short because Grandma can fix that little problem. Once she gets old enough to step on a scale ours will be thrown out. Weight and inches will not be something that is focused on. I'm not going to ban magazines and fashion because she will have to learn to deal with those things but she will learn in an open and structured and ask anything kind of environment. I know I can't protect her from it but I can make sure she focuses on being healthy and not just being skinny.
Even though it was the darkest time in my life I learned a lot from it. In reading and trying to find hints for myself at the time I learned also what to look for. I learned the early signs. I learned different tricks on how to hide it. At this point I look back and I'm thankful for that aspect of it because I know what to look for. I know the numerous amount of tricks and excuses. I also know that early intervention is key.
If you get anything from this entry I want it to be the idea of education and being proactive. Parents, teachers, friends & family. Educate yourselves. This has been a problem for YEARS and it's not going away anytime soon. Know the signs. The signs are starting as early as 5 YEARS OLD. Talk healthy body image to your kids (girls AND boys).
I've included some resources if you're curious.
Eating disorder treatment
If you want to see/read about the shirt go here & here.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
"Have you ever had one of those moments in your life where you wish you had a do-over button? I'm in the middle of one right now. I've come to a point in my life where I'm regretful of things I didn't do an should have done before now. Don't get me wrong. I'm madly in love with my handsome husband and my beautiful blue eyed girl. They would not be a part of this do-over. The stuff I would re-do would still include them being the conclusion of it all. I've always been of of those "what if" kinds. A few times it got my in trouble but the last one got my a husband and it's the best "what if" I've given into.
There is nothing to really give in to at this point. I'm simply envious of those who lived it up, whether individually or as a couple, before babies came. I'm envious of those who traveled abroad in their college years or after. I'm envious of my friends who just up and moved, bravely, across the states or world and have made it. I'm envious of those who actually learned something in college. I'm envious of my friends, my husband included, who know those randomly cool things about any and everything. I'm envious of my best friend who knows the name (s) of this plant because she's cool like that. I'm envious of my college friends who have already gone back to school and earned their MSW. I'm envious of my fashionable friends. I'm envious of my friends who aren't afraid to wear red lipstick. I'm envious of the people who I met and come in contact with who seem to have it all together and then some. I'm envious of the pages I read being something I want to have instead of writing the pages myself.
On the other hand...I wouldn't trade my incredibly handsome husband for any other man out there. He is a provider. He loves me unconditionally. He even lets me pout for a few minutes before asking if I'm finished pouting because he knows I just need to have a good pout sometimes. He is a hard worker. He loves Teagan and I to his bones. He loves the idea of family and helping out whenever he can. Somedays I feel like he towers over me but he is a tower of protection and not one that I cower before. Then there is our amazingly beautiful baby girl. She is the joy of my soul and I didn't realize I could love another human like I love her. She is a piece of me and Josh combined. She is the two of us melded together for eternity. How incredible is that? How thankful am I for her? More thankful as each day passes. Even when times are frustrating all I need is a sweet smile or a "lovin'" from Teagan and the world is good again.
So yeah, I get frustrated with my job and my house and where we live (kind of ). I get frustrated that I have to work or that I'm not using my degree properly. I get frustrated that I'm not fashoinable (despite what some of my Exodus girls think). I get frustrated we can't take Teagan and travel the world. Then, I come home to my untidy house, my handsome husband and my beautiful baby girl and all is well again."
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
*I came upon this doing a random search of people with names I know. How cool is that?!*
Monday, October 18, 2010
Teagan & Tommy the Bear
October 15-17, 2010
Teagan met a new friend on Friday. His name is Tommy the Bear. Tommy asked Ms. Haley, Ms. Alice and Ms. Judy if he could home with Teagan for the weekend and they said yes!
After Teagan and Tommy got strapped into the car Teagan told Tommy all about the weekend they were going to have. First, the hockey game (her first too) and then the pumpkin patch in the mountains, church on Sunday and then a visit with the Grandparents!
That evening Teagan’s mom changed her clothes into something warm and then gave Tommy a pair of pants to put on because it would be cold in the hockey arena. Teagan and Tommy ate a little dinner before the family got on the road. Teagan was so excited to go to her first hockey game that night and equally excited to share it with her new friend. Teagan had watched hockey on the TV with her daddy but had never seen a real. Live. Game!
Teagan and Tommy watched the game and yelled and clapped and even did the chicken dance!
When the hockey game was over Teagan and Tommy settled into bed to get rested up for the next day when they would go to the pumpkin patch in Asheville!
Teagan and Tommy had to get up kind of early to meet up with Teagan’s boyfriend, Miles David and his parents. On the ride to Asheville, Teagan and Tommy both took a nap. When they woke up they were at Hickory Nut Farm! They got out of the car and into Miles David’s little red wagon! They bundled all up and Miles’s dad pulled them!
They looked at chickens, pigs, horses and cows!
After they looked at the animals Teagan, Tommy and Miles stopped to play a little before they went to the corn maze.
Then they all got in their carriers and decided to walk around the corn maze and pick out a pumpkin!
After they walked the corn maze and picked out their pumpkins Teagan, Tommy and Miles buckled up in their car seats and took a nap on the way to downtown Asheville. When they got to Asheville, the kids got out and walked around downtown Asheville, they played in the leaves and got some yummy food to eat. After a fun day in the mountains it was time to go home.
Teagan and Tommy snuggled in the car seat all the way home.
*this is AFTER she was taken out of the car. She was strapped in properly while riding in the car*
Teagan, Tommy and her family went to check on Grandma and Grandpa’s farm. Teagan played with her grandparents and introduced them to Tommy. Teagan showed off her daddy’s hat & they had such fun!
That night after Teagan, Tommy and Teagan’s mommy and daddy had all took a nap and had baths and had eaten dinner it was time for story time! Teagan loves to read and was super excited that Tommy had brought books with him from school!
After Teagan’s mommy read them two stories it was time to tuck Teagan and Tommy into bed. They each got kisses & hugs night night and were sent to bed with prayers of sweet dreams.
Teagan had such a good weekend with her new friend Tommy! She can’t wait to hear about the adventures her friends have with him soon!
Sunday, October 17, 2010
They reset the numbers over at the Top Baby Blog website...we were inching closer to the top spot page but now we're back on the lower end of the numbers. If you like reading Teagan Tales and would like to help us move back up the ranks could you please just give us 5 seconds of your time and vote for us (just two clicks!) on Top Baby Blogs!
Just click the link below and then click one more time and you've voted!
Thanks in advance!
I just wanted to say a big thanks to my US readers and my readers from all the other countries too!!
Teagan got her very first pen pal package the other day and had such a good time opening it! She loved everything in it...right down to the box!
Teagan went to her first hockey game on Friday (more on that later) and she got the finishing touches to her Eva box!! She is so excited and can't wait for me to mail it for her this week!
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
1) Little Bear is CRAWLING now!! I cannot believe we have a crawler now!
2) Barley & Birch (more on this later!)
3)My Bojangles biscuit this morning...clearly made by "Betty"
4) Little Bear's eye looks like it's going to take care of itself!
5) Japanese Cloth Lucky Owl
6) Chilean miners have all been rescued!!
7) Hoot owl beanie
8) Owl blocks
9) Cowboy Boots
10) Pastel dress
11) Baby baby doll dress
12) Cherry Blossom plate
13) Nesting Birds
14) Relaxing on the couch with my hubby watching Hells Kitchen.
15) Possibly going to Teagan's first Checkers game Friday!!
16) Heading towards Asheville and pumpkin patches on Saturday with the Heavners!!
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Frances was selfless and humble and caring and genuinely kind. She gave of herself without ever asking "what about me".
Pastor Mike told us during the funeral today that Frances wanted to leave two things when she left. She wanted people to remember to 1) Preach the Gospel and 2) Give yourself away.
I can only hope that in my lifetime I will be able to leave such a legacy. To be remembered as selfless, humble, caring, and genuinely kind. I selfishly want to be missed, if even for a short time. I want people to know where I am going when I die. I want people to be comforted by that fact. I want my life to make a difference here on earth.
So, I am thankful for the time I had with Frances Martin. I wish I had gotten to know her better. Her funeral today led me to hug my Mamaw even tighter.
Tomorrow is another day. What will your legacy be?
Anyway, here are the rules/directions. It's another one of those pass it on awards! All you have to do for the Cherry on Top award is:
1. Answer the question "If I had the chance to go back and change one thing in my life, would I, and what would it be?
2. Pick up to 6 people and give them this award.
3. Thank the person who gave the award.
My answer: If I had to go back and change one thing in my life it would be to live life in college. I feel like I didn't take advantage of my college years. There is so much I wish I would have done and been involved in and places I would have gone. I can count on 2 fingers the number of people I met in college that I actually talk to on a regular basis. That's so sad. I just ran through my college years in a fog. I think it's because I had so many mental health things going on during that time that I was just trying to get through it. I feel like I was robbed of my college experience. My sister-in-law is currently at UNC Chapel Hill and the things she is doing and planning to do make me envy her. I get excited for her when she talks about going places and doing things that I wish I would have done. I would have loved to study abroad. I never did. I would have loved to gone to a single football game. I never did. I would have loved to have made the Dean's list. I never did. I do blame this on my mental state at the time but it doesn't change the longing to pull that time back down from the shelf and do it over again. On the other hand, if I had done all those things where would I be now? Maybe I wouldn't be where I'm at now. Married. With an amazing baby. Settled. Part of me doesn't want to be settled yet. The other part of me, the mommy part of me, knows that no matter what I want Teagan & Josh are the most important right now and so I will put those thoughts back on the shelf and just occasionally take a peek. But knowing that with each peek there will be heartache and then a reality check and then I will look back at my baby girl and know it was all worth it.
Moment & Impressions
Tie a Little Ribbon
Monday, October 11, 2010
Here was Teagan's for today:
5 objects that are all same size and color: mixing bowls, etc.What To Do:
Stacking is a wonderful activity that will help your child begin to understand math concepts. Enjoy showing your child how to stack mixing bowls and other containers in order of size. Try to keep these objects in a low drawer in your kitchen for your child to stack!
Use only 3 or 4 at first. Add more as your child continues to show interest. Count as you stack.
Thursday, October 7, 2010
*a lot of pictures to follow*
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Please send me your information so I get your prize to you!
Thank you to all who entered the contest! Look for more to come!
Monday, October 4, 2010
Friday, October 1, 2010
"I've been so proud of you throughout the years. With exquisite joy and deligh, I have watched you grow and marveled at the mysteries and curiosities of each stage unraveling before my eyes. You've made me so happy; your love has kept me solid through my own journey in life."