Time after time.

So many times over the last few months I have thought about a blog post. So many times I've had a thought come flooding through my head in the middle of the night only to find myself giving in to sleep, or the wishful thinking of such an act. So many times I have been having a time with one of the girls and I think to myself about how if I would type it up that it could potentially help another mom realize they weren't alone in the confusion and chaos. So many times I've felt strong or weak or pretty or not so lovely that I felt the need to write. There have been adventures and parties and service opportunities that I'd thought would be nice to share but they never did. There have been new words, new dances, and new yoga poses that I felt were worth sharing but didn't.
Over the last few months I've been working on life. Actually living it. I got sucked so deep into the world of online that it was taking over. I pulled back from the life I was living online and threw myself back into reality. Want to know something? I didn't grow an extra appendage nor did I have one retract! I've actually lived life again. I'm not watching the world through my fingers. I'm not seeking out things to do with my family just so I can blog about it or announce it to the world.
That being said, I'm baby stepping back into the online world. Back into letting my fingers dance on the keyboard once again. I've missed it. I've also realized I have to tread carefully or risk being drawn in again. So, here we go 2015. Lets live this.

The things she says...

Mommy, God controls everything, right? -Teagan

Yes, He does, T. -Me

And He knows everything, right? - Teagan

Yes, Teagan, He does. -Me

So, I guess He knows when its best for us to go to bed because He turns off the sun, huh? -Teagan

I love the mind of my almost 5 year old. Oh Teagan...sweet sweet Teagan. To think so concretely about our God. How the hustle and bustle and chaos of life just gets in the way. Can you imagine the simplicity of just believing? Without putting in our own preference to what it "should be" and engaging in the opinions of the world? How I often long for that innocence and just matter of factness. 

Funny thing, weather.

Y'all, I have not blogged since July. Life happened. Full time job happened. One late night a week happened. A new deck happened. More time with my family happened.

It was needed time away. Needed time to put my priorities back in order. It was time to live my life, our lives, for real instead of at the need for a blog post.

There is something about fall that makes me want to do all the things. Like eat three apples a day, run and run and run, drink too much coffee, snuggle my girls while wrapped under a blanket reading a book, kiss my sweet husband a little longer, sleep with the windows up, and campout in the backyard (or somewhere else).

Fall is my favorite. It's just begun. I just wish it would linger as long as possible.

Warm rains in NC.

Rainy storm-less days are few and far between when you live in North Carolina. Most of the time the rain is accompanied with thunder and lightning. When we get the treat of having just a warm summer rain we try to make sure we take advantage of it. 

Teagan is our little dancer; she loves everything about dance and movement of her body. However, you have to catch her on a day where her shyness has momentarily left the building or when she doesn't know you're watching her.  I love to catch her when she thinks nobody is watching because there is something so innocent and precious about the rawness and the vulnerability and the freedom. 

Kyra Mae is our fearless snuggler. She continues to test her independence as long as Josh or I are in her direct line of sight. She is also trying to figure out who she is apart from Teagan while wanting to be like Teagan. It's so funny how early it happens. It's in subtle ways but it's happening and it has been interesting to watch how she maneuvers through her latest challenge.

Kyra Mae

Y'all, can you believe this girl? I can't even get over her sometimes. 

Mothers Day.

Mothers Day 2014. 

These are the women of my family. Each of us are stubborn and bull-headed. Sometimes we are stubborn and bull-headed towards each other. However, we are family and we are fiercely devoted to one another. I am thankful for the way God has made us incredibly different but I am more thankful for the ways He has made our hearts so similar. From our hearts to yours. 

Pinky toes.

When is the last time you thought about your pinky toe? Other than to complain there isn't enough toenail to paint or the last time all your foot except your pinky toe got through the threshold of the door? If you're anything like me, other than those instances my pinky toe doesn't even cross my mind. Thing is, the pinky toe is a pretty important part of the body.  The pinky toe helps the body to balance. The pinky toe also functions autonomously from the other toes but is a necessary part. 

Our Pastor spoke this morning on Ephesians 4 and the parts of the body of Christ's church. This is one of those passages I've read and heard pastors speak on a lot. Every time I've heard it I have had myself as the main character. My take away from the passage has been more about what gift have I been given. I've not always thought about it in terms of service of the body.  

This morning, I heard it a new way: How I seek Jesus and how I use the gifts God has given me directly effects my sisters and brothers in Christ. If I am not utilizing those gifts given to me, if I am not spending time with the Lord, if I am not seeking Him then it directly effects the body. However, the body is NOT dependent on me. I, like that pinky toe, function autonomously from the body and the body can function without me but it works better if I'm doing my job.  Honestly, I never thought about how those days where I am "too busy" to dig into the Word effects how I relate to the church family.

This passage also triggered a response of thanks in me and the drive to do more thanking. I know there have been times in my life where I was serving in the behind the scenes jobs and often felt forgotten or unimportant. And while serving is never supposed to be about affirmation of self, it is nice to hear a sincere thank you every now and then. Satan also used those times of feeling forgotten to dig in to my head and heart that I am not needed. My emotions have always been a tunnel to the feelings of despair for me and satan has used that tunnel several times over the years.  That being said, when is the last time you told your kid's Sunday School teacher thank you? What about those sweet people who take care of the coffee in the morning? Also, do you know how time consuming it can be to set up the AV system and make sure the power points go smoothly with the songs as well as the pastors sermons? We also have people who restock the peppermints in the bowls and people who make sure there is toilet paper in the bathrooms. Our worship team works hard to maintain their craft and the decorating and the esthetics don't just happen. So, I'm challenging myself and you to thank somebody within your church sincerely and specifically in the next week or so. Whose in?