Me.
I had that first really awful Mommy moment this morning. I fell. With Teagan. On the asphalt. And she hit her head. I'm not sure what I tripped on or if I just fell over my own two feet. What I do know is that my Mommy reflexes were not quick enough to cushion her head from the concrete. So, it bounced and THEN I caught it. We were in the middle of the car line at school and all I could do was sit there (yes, in the road) and rock her while she cried because her mommy had just fallen and she'd gotten hurt. After about 45 seconds I regained my composure and realized we needed ice or a "boo-boo pack" (and to get out of the road) so I rushed into her school, got one out of the freezer and immediately applied it praying the knot would come up so we were in the clear of a concussion. I went into an empty classroom with a rocking chair and just sat there rocking her, holding the "boo-boo pack" and apologizing over and over again. She snuggled up to me and just sat there while I rocked her trying not to cry. After a few minutes she wanted to hold the "boo-boo pack" and I felt the knot and saw the bruise and I knew she was okay. That didn't stop me from snuggling with her for a few more minutes before I took her into her classroom.
After I got her settled I went to the car and cried. Then I cried some more. I have never felt so bad. I keep replaying the fall in my head along with the sound effects.
Thankfully, we are both okay, just bumped & bruised. I do know it will take a few days for it to get outta my head though. Big fat Mommy Fail.
It's not a fail, it's just an accident and there will be many of them. I fell with my son and broke his ankle. He was 6 months old and I figured CPS would knock at my door and take him away at any moment. I spent a week in the dumps, feeling as if I had failed him. I now know that these types of things are going to happen. It could have been so much worse on her part and on your part being pregnant. Take care of yourself, you are a wonderful mommy! Bruises make us stronger.
ReplyDeleteI'm with Stacey. Not a fail at all. You do the best you can and sometimes...crap happens. Believe me. I turned too fast and banged the boy's head on the door jamb. (Whispering: more than once). Cried more than he did. It happens to the best of us, the most diligent, the most loving, the safest, baby-proofingest. Know that you did your best after an accident likely due to your equilibrium being off, and give yourself a break.
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