Monday, October 14, 2013

He answered not a word...

I was reading Spurgeon's "Morning and Evening" devotion (thanks to Hayley I figured out there is a free app) a few days ago and the words seemed to just jump off the page.
He answered Not a word...Matthew 15:23
If you have been following me on Twitter or here on the blog much you'd know I have been unemployed since last June.  Part of that time I was in grad school and we were surviving on student loans.  However, I graduated in May of this year and I'm still unemployed.  We've always been a two income family so life has often leaned on the difficult side for the last few months.
I've learned some things over these last few months though. Sometimes peace is not instantaneous. Sometimes it takes months or even years for the fruition of peace to come. Even with great and almost unwavering faith; peace is not always promised to come in our time (please don't think I'm claiming this, I waver often even with a solid foundation). We are on His time. Sometimes He answers us in what is ideally our time. Sometimes He answers us in what is more obviously His.  But how much sweeter is it when that moment comes? Where peaces rushes over us as if we were standing under a gentle waterfall? 
I am at that place right now. I have cried out to Him. I have cried in anger, desperation, frustration, and confusion. He answered not a word. Yet, I still have faith.  I still hold on to His promises that I will see that day and be overcome with joy when He says "Oh woman, great is your faith".  I will slip and stumble a lot on this current path and my faith with undoubtably waver at times but I know that He is unwavering and constant and that is all I need right now.

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