While submitting to my husband has been a blessing to me. It has also been a challenge. My sinful nature takes over more often than not. My need to lead and do things my way takes over more often than I would like to admit.
Some things I have learned that has help make this task easier has been:
Digging into the word. Digging. Digging. Digging. There is a correlation with this and how I treat my husband. There is a correlation with my time in the Word and how I treat my children. Digging into the word has also molded my heart to appreciate what submissive means. To realize more and more that submitting is not a bad thing. Submitting is allowing my husband to take charge of our family but with that charge comes an extreme responsibility. He is going to be held accountable for our family. For me. For our girls. I am going to do everything in my power to help him and stand by him in his charge. THAT is why I choose to be submissive. I am called to be his helper. Eve was made out of Adams side. Not his back. Not his front. But his side. Not cowering behind him or running ahead. To walk beside him and be his partner.
Praying for my husband. I pray for Josh at least 5 days out of the week and I pray very specific things for him. I got the specific prayers from here and I have tried to follow them. I haven't stopped. I just re-pray when the month runs out.
Giving myself grace. I am going to mess up. Submissive is not in my nature. Like the post I wrote last time, submission to me was weakness. These last few years have been a learning curve. God's grace has been evident through those years. I still mess up and I will continue to mess up until I am put in my grave and dancing with my Savior.
So, yes, it is going to be difficult. It's not going to be easy. Is it going to be worth it? Absolutely.
If you'd like to have a conversation on submission please feel free to e-mail me. I know submission has a very negative connotation in our day and age. Living biblically is seen as old-fashioned to a lot of women and men of our generation and those younger and even older. Submission is often taken out of context and made to be something negative. It's seen as the woman lingering in the corner waiting on her husband to provide her with his next request. That is NOT how it is. That is NOT how the Bible portrays it. I really don't want women to think that is how it is. So please, e-mail me, message me on Twitter, message me on Facebook, leave a comment here. Please don't go on thinking submission equals weak and bad and negative. Please reach out. And if you live close we can even meet up. If not, I Skype. We can have a virtual cup of coffee and chat.
Your heart shines through in this, even in the hard of embracing submission. It is amazing to see how God changes our hearts through allowing Him to work out these hard counter cultural concepts in our lives. Check out Kathi Lipp's book Praying God's Word for Your Husband. It is a great resource! Love this post!
ReplyDeleteOh Rici - I love this post. I am a leader (controler) by nature. And I struggle in this area the most.
ReplyDeleteWhen Michael was in school, I was in charge of EVERYTHING. Some of it was logistics, other things I just really couldn't let go of - like the finances. I wanted his input, but I wanted to do it my way. We were never on the same page and it drove me batty.
One day we just decided to let him handle it all. I turned it all over and let it go - and you know what happened? At first he changed everything - even down to the bank. I resisted a few times - but tried to really accept my new role. I stepped back. I let him take ownership and lead our family.
Over the last few years, we talk about our finances, share thoughts about our budget and really are on the same page. Everything i struggled and prayed on happened in that area once I let the control go.