Thursday, August 25, 2011

Goal: VBAC. The successful kind.

I don't make it a secret that I had a C-section with Teagan.  There is nothing to be ashamed of.  I had an incredibly successful c-section that I recovered marvelously from. Dr. James totally rocked it.  Was it my ideal way to bring our sweet girl into the world? No. Was it necessary? My doctor thought so and I trust my doctor.  We trust my doctors.  The ultimate goal of healthy baby/healthy mommy was met and that is what counts.
This go 'round we are aiming for a VBAC.  The doctors, Josh and I have discussed it and they are all for it as long as this baby is under 8 lbs (even though I have one doc who thinks Baby Bear is going to be a giant).  Also, the fact that I didn't develop gestational diabetes this time is playing in our favor. 
Honestly, I am starting to get a little nervous.  The nervous that started sneaking up around this time with Teagan. The HOLY COW THIS BABY HAS TO COME OUT nervous!!!  When I went into labor with Teagan the thought of a c-section hadn't really crossed my mind.  I did a lot of laboring at home and by the time we got to the hospital I was at 7cm and still going strong.  They say the second baby comes faster and there is a lot to consider with a VBAC so basically at the sign of real labor this time we'll need to head to the hospital.  This stirs a mixture of feelings through me.  I know why I need to get to the hospital quickly and we will but I am anxious about it.  I know the second we get into the room they are going to start hooking me up to everything under the sun to make sure things are going smoothly.  I get that. I really do. Am I excited about it? No. I don't want to be hooked up to a lot of things. I want to be free to labor in my "froggy" position like I did so well with Teagan and I want to be able to walk and shower and do it my way.  I am fearful it won't happen that way because of all the precautions that have to be taken.  Then there is still the possibility of a c-section that will linger until we go into labor.  We will have an ultrasound when I am 36 weeks to see what the size of Baby Bear is estimated to be and then a decision about the c-section will be made.  Until then we are going forward with the VBAC plan. 
Right now, as much as I want a VBAC, I am determined to stay open minded about the whole situation.  Josh and I have discussed it and obviously we are only concerned with the healthy baby/healthy mommy outcome no matter how we get there.